If you can’t stand the heat…

Is it just me or does the extreme heat and humidity make you nuts too?

Funny how it never bothered me a few years back when I could lounge by the pool, soaking up the sun, taking an occasional dip and hoping I didn't get skin cancer. Or how when you're little it never seemed to bother you to be outdoors in hot temperatures, running in the sprinkler, riding a bike or climbing a tree.

If I tried to do that stuff now, I'd probably have a meltdown.

It's interesting that when it's winter, we all say it's too cold, and that we can't wait for summer to get here. But now that summer hit (and only a few days ago, officially), the majority of those around me are ready for a cool breeze. And just in case you were wondering, it's exactly six months until Christmas Eve.

Maybe it wouldn't bother me so much if the second I went outside, my hair didn't go POOF. Now wait a second, I swear I actually did my hair today. All those precious minutes wasted as the humidity works against my determination to straighten out my mop. Too bad — Mother Nature wins again.

We can find a million things to complain about (such as how embarrassing one's hair looks), but we've also got several fun (or not-so-fun scenarios) we all wish didn't happen to us.

• You've been sitting in a car with leather seats (although they don't necessarily have to be leather) and when you go to get out, you literally have to peel your legs off of the seat. And as you go to walk into wherever it is you're going, you have to embarrassingly adjust those sweaty shorts (or pants) as they have determined to stick to your visibly sweaty skin. (And don't kid yourself, we all take a quick look around to make sure no one is watching us do this.)

• I swear I washed my hair today. You wouldn't be able to tell, because the instant I walk outside, my hairline begins to drip profusely with what can only be described as what looks like I just got out of the shower. And then later when you get all cooled down, it still looks bad, even oily.

• My face looks like what? You mean those black streaks aren't supposed to be there running down my face? Crap! That mascara and eyeliner don't look as good smeared all over my face, do they? I hate that. When you have to be outside for a prolonged period of time, and you take off your sunglasses only to discover that it appears you've been crying for hours.

• I have wet spots where? Oh that's right, those sweat stains look sweet! Whether it's your butt (and it so often is), your back, armpits or just your face, it's super embarrassing. If I could have an internal cooling system helping adjust my body to the heat and humidity, that would be great; but since I don't, people know I sweat. And no, I did not just get done with an hour-long step class.

• And while this isn't embarrassing, just annoying, it's no fun to wear eyeglasses in this weather either, as they fog up when you go in and outside.

OK, those are the physical things. But what about the mental side effects of extreme heat?
When I get too hot, I actually feel like I'm going to pass out, suffocate or just plain go crazy! I hate stepping outside and instantly feeling like I can't breathe.

And watch out if I've been in the heat for too long, because I get a little crabby. You thought PMS was bad — you've got another thing coming.

If I'm hot I get short with people, I get headaches, I feel claustrophobic and I'm bound to go crazy on someone if they hit the wrong nerve.

It's a good thing someone invented  air conditioning, otherwise I might go on a crime spree.
I understand this weather is fun for people who get to hang out at a swimming pool or lake all day, but what about people like me who don't get to do that?

I have lived in areas of extreme heat, but I was lucky it was dry heat. I probably didn't even realize it was hot when I lived in Arizona as a child. But then I moved to the midwest. Ah, the
midwest — extreme temperature changes and lovely weather conditions. You gotta love it. Or not. Whichever.